Days of Fasting
by Amberthepirate
Summary: "Tony had gained exactly 2 pounds in the weeks following the day fondly dubbed "The Day When Shit went down. Its wasn't good enough, and he wasn't going to allow himself to become lax after all the hard work he'd put in. " WARNINGS: Angst, Eating disorders, Therapy SLASH: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
1. Chapter 1

Days of Fasting 

Tony had gained exactly 2 pounds in the weeks following the day fondly dubbed "The Day When Shit went down."

Its wasn't good enough, he wasn't going to allow himself to become lax after all the hard work he'd put in.

It was the Shwarma that started it, he'd never had suggested going for food if his mind was in the right place, but after nearly dying and flying off into outer space to blow up and alien spacecraft with a big ass missile; it's safe to assume Tony wasn't _all there_ when he regained consciousness.

To be fair he'd never tried the stuff before, he'd seen it, sure, driving by and seeing various places around the city selling it. But he'd waved it off as another food he couldn't and shouldn't eat because who knows how many carbohydrates, fats, sugars and or salts may be hidden inside.

When various brain cells had rebooted and the statement of "We won" had sunk in along with feelings of appropriate relief and exhaustion, Tony was to bone tried to protest as he slumped into his chair at the Shwarma joint. Besides, how would it look if he changed his mine suddenly? He already had 'Not a team player' and 'Narcissist' written in big red letters in his SHEILD file, he didn't want to add 'split personality disorder' while he was at it.

On the plus side, he got away with eating very little, as the team was either too tired or too busy with their own food to take much interest in what he was doing.

Captain American was falling asleep at the very table and actually did fall asleep on the ride home, slumped over his shield, and he wined when anyone tried to take it from him. It would have been adorable, kind of, if the guy hadn't been an uptight tin soldier dressed in flag pyjamas.

Not surprisingly, everything else seemed rather anti climatic after the chaos of an alien invasion. Days went as they usually did, Tony tried his best to keep in shape, alternating between the gym, his lab, whatever press conference or meeting he was dragged too and only allowing himself a set amount of calories in a meal.

When he was alone he could have some of his meals in smoothes, which was much better; even if JARVIS did whir in disapproval above his head.

The Avengers were called out more and more over the preceding months and someone had the clever idea that they should all live under the same roof. Reasons from 'It'll be more practical' to 'We need to bond better as a unit' were thrown around but to Tony they were all invalid and he fought, oh how he fought to keep that idea just an idea and not a reality. But when you're outvoted five to one there's nothing you can do.

"I don't get why you're so against this Stark." Steve Rogers said, crossing his massive arms and giving an impressive Captain America glare. "In my day, troops who fought together lived together. It was better that way."

There were one or two nods from the others, including Bruce and Tony quite rightly sent a sneer in his direction. "We've had this argument Spangles, we are not soldiers, or troops, and never will be. You need to get your ass out of the past and face reality."

The genius was harsh, hurtful, childish, and he knew it. The uneasy truce he's struck with the younger man was out the window, they could not live together. End of story. Tony couldn't have his schedule ruined, not after just perfecting it.

Steve set his jaw in that 'I expected better from you' way, but didn't rise to Tony obvious baiting. He was trying not to get into a petty fight; he was trying to be cooperative, which just made Tony look like the biggest douche in the universe. Other than Loki of course.

The Black Widow, with tightly coiled assassin prowess gave his a look across the table that was enough to chill his blood. Tony shivered and avoided looking at her, continuing to dig his own grave "Think about it. It doesn't take a genius like me to figure out that five big personalities in one small space just doesn't work. Half of us would be dead or at least mutilated within the month."

Hawkeye audibly snorted. "Face it Stark, you just don't like to share."

Tony let out a huff and turned to Clint Barton, ready to rail at him then Fury, who'd been strangely silent throughout this whole thing cut in to stop him.

"Children, children, there's no point in bickering. It's already been decided, you all move into Avengers tower on Tuesday, so, get your asses out of here and get packed. No exceptions."

Tony groaned and rubbed his temples, the sight of Clint and Steve's audacious looks of triumph made him twitch with the need for a medicinal pick me up. Half twelve wasn't too early to drink was it?

He was out the door as fast as he could, and headed straight for Happy's parked car on the sidewalk, ignoring the voices behind his head.

"Did he seem sick to you?"

"Hmm? Who?"

"Stark, he looked kinda –pasty"

"Pfft, nah, he's just a little shell shocked over not getting his own way."

"He could always do with a bit more time outside, c'mon; we need to get our things."

Before he knew it, moving day is upon him, and Tony is given the task of showing two assassins, a green rage monster, a Norse god and a man out of time around what is to be there home. He'd have to take a moment to consider when his life had spiralled into insanity.

"_Right_" he said, around a long suffering sigh. "You each get a floor to yourselves, unless the murder twins want to stick together in which case go nuts, Thor you can have the top floor because you like to be near lighting or whatever –as for you two.." He eyed Steve and Bruce who looked at him blankly. "Pick any apart from floor 18, that's my floor."

Tony checked his watch, the tours was over as far as he was concerned. "Need anything ask JARVIS, he's my AI and he lives in the walls. Have fun." With a plastic smile, Tony turned on his heels and headed to the nearest elevator. While the doors closed he heard the grating voice of Clint yell through "Way to make a guy feel welcome stark!" but he takes no notice.

The room was left quiet, and the new inhabitants were left to absorb the information that had been thrown at them, and heave their various bags to their new floors.

"He's such a jackass." Clint mumbled, adjusting his backpack.

Steve shook his head. "I know he's not used to communal living, but he could at least have the good grace to explain things a little better...I don't even-"

Bruce cut into their conversation quite suddenly and said "Tony doesn't have to do anything. This is his tower, he designed it...he built it." He narrows his eyes at the two men, and takes a moment to say quietly to Steve "You should know better" before leaving to find his floor.

"Hmm. Who's JARVIS?"

"_That would be me Mr Barton."_

"THE HELL-"

Tony was an only child. Which, granted, means he never had to share his toys growing up, but that also means he was left with no one two play with. Just two parents who were too busy to engage with him beyond making sure he was alive.

Tony loved people, he was sociable person. Being alone is a horrible feeling, so he makes sure he's always got someone nearby, and he made sure he's always appealing by looking gorgeous. Thin that is.

It's amazing just how much information you can give someone just on the way you look, so Tony learned to play the game; he smiled when he felt like crying, he laughed when he felt like throwing up and most importantly, he said he wasn't hungry when he felt half starved.

At first it wasn't that bad, the Avengers gave each other their own space, and there were few if any altercations. Then the great and powerful Capsicle decided that the Avengers needed to spend more time together, and bond and share and all those things that made Tony's skin crawl.

It couldn't have been any worse than Tony found out just how these magical moments were going to take place.

"Are you allergic to anything?" Steve asks him one day in the kitchen. Tony is on his third cup of coffee of the morning in place of breakfast, he was too drowsy and hungry to register Steve's question properly.

"Hmm?" he replied.

Steve sighed and leant back on the stool he was sitting on to give Tony an irritated look across the kitchen. "I said are you allergic to anything? Food wise, I mean."

Tony wrinkled his brow at the question. "Er...no." He took note of the pad and pencil in front of Steve. "What's that for?"

"I'm going to cook dinner for the team once a week, so I thought I'd plan ahead and avoid any problems later." Steve said idly.

Tony stopped himself from spluttering into his coffee cup and turned to look at the younger man with panicked eyes. "Say what now?"

"It would be a good idea if we all came to together to have a proper meal, and eat at the table." Steve paused to give Tony a steady glance over his massive shoulders. "it might seem old fashioned to you, but when I was younger dinner was a time to talk about the day, to share any concerns, to enjoy the company of others."

So...Emotions and food, two of Tony's most hated things in the entire world meshed together. Perhaps he'd better dig his own grave now, to save time later.

While Tony was having a meltdown internally, Steve spoke again. "...I think I could like you Tony."

Tony stopped his inner freak-out for a moment, and stared at Steve like he had two heads. "Huh, You know, I'm gonna take a moment to pretend you really did say that."

Steve looked stung, and Tony was hit with the mental image of a puppy crying. "I'm serious Tony." The soldier insisted. "I..I think we could get along fine, I just don't know you too well." His mouth curved upwards into a shy, soft smile.

Tony was almost swayed by the sincerity in Steve's voice alone, but then he felt his stomach rumble and he remembered why this was not a good idea. He just hoped Steve didn't hear it.

"The thing is.." he started. "I'm actually really busy, and when I say busy I mean really super _busy_ for six days out of seven so chances are that I won't be around for this social experiment are not great."

It was a poor excuse, and Tony knew it, and the look Steve was giving him would have been enough to melt the hearts of a thousand axe murderers. So he caved "But I'll try my best."

Steve's face broke into a warm grin and he called to Tony as the genius fled back to his lab. "Be sure you do! Everyone needs to eat."

Of course, that was something Tony had no intention of doing.


	2. Chapter 2

It was just getting harder and harder.

Tony only had so many excuses up his sleeve, and there were so many that the team would buy.

"Sorry, Cap, I just had lunch with Pep. I'm full up." He said sheepishly, as Steve pushed a bowl of beef stew under his nose, which only made his mouth water and his stomach growl.

He'd then try his best to ignore Steve's bewildered/disappointed expression, and with five sets of eyes boring into his back he'd beat a hasty retreat down to his lab.

He'd already lost the two pounds he'd gained, but he figure losing maybe one...two or even three more wouldn't do any harm.

He knew when to avoid the tower like the plague, which were Monday mornings when Bruce brought in fresh pastries for the whole team, Wednesdays when they ordered pizza, and of course...Sundays when Steve cooked dinner. The later was the hardest to get out of.

It was bad enough that Steve seemed to be on some sort of one man crusade to keep Tony healthy, but the fact that Tony felt like such a dick every time he had to say no made it so much worse.

The game changed one day when Tony went into the kitchen allowing himself a rare moment of weakness to find some unsalted crackers, they wouldn't have too many calories.

He happened to open the fridge and discover, a dinner plate with a whole lot of food still on it covered in shrink wrap and with his name on it.

"...What's this?" he asked, trying to keep his voice casual.

Bruce, who was reading a book on the kitchen counter top (an actual book! Not a Kindle) made a non committal noise "Pardon?"

Tony huffed impatiently and pointed an accusing finger at the plate of doom in the fringe. "What is THIS? And why is my name on it? I could sue for copy right you know."

Bruce looked up in amusement "Its leftovers from dinner last night, Steve didn't want you to go hungry so he saved some for you."

Tony inwardly groaned, Steve, of course it would be Steve.

"Are you okay?" Bruce was looking at Tony over the rims of his glasses curiously. "You look kind of...sick."

Tony raised a dark eyebrow. "Sick? Sick how?" Tony knew exactly 'sick how', his skin was pale, his hair was drab, and the wrinkles around his eyes and mouth were more pronounced then they were a few months ago.

Bruce titled his head. "Sort of...tired. I know you don't sleep at regular intervals...maybe you should take it easy?"

Tony snorted. "No way Brucie, being a genius billionaire philanthropist is a big responsibility. I can't let down all those people depending on my awesomeness."

Bruce sighed. "Well, even genius billionaire philanthropist's need to rest..." after a beat he added. "And eat."

That got Tony's attention. He jerked around to give Bruce a long look, who returned it. Did he know...? Or maybe it was Tony's imagination. That was probably it. Tony snatched up the crackers he found and squirreled himself away into his workshop.

He then proceeded to wolf down the entire packet.

About 20 minutes later, he was curled around the toilet in the bathroom, throwing up violently. It was surprisingly easy to make himself sick, the human body was a funny thing.

The bile made his mouth burn, and his stomach constricted in protest as the remains of his cracker lunch was sloshed into the bowl.

There was a gently knocking at the door and Tony's hands gripped the toilet seat.

"Tony?" called a soft voice, Steve's voice. "Are you okay?"

Tony cleared his throat with a gagging cough in an effort to make his voice sound less pained. "Just fine, yeah...just a little sick, shouldn't have had that vodka on my cereal this morning."

He could hear Steve shifting outside. "You want me to get Bruce?"

"No!" Tony said a bit too quickly. "He's not even THAT kind of doctor..." he groaned

"...Can I come in?" Steve asked.

"Don't you have old ladies to save from trees or something?" Tony snipped, REALLY not in the mood for the Captains mothering. He just wanted to wallow in his pity and vomit in peace.

"I think that's kittens." Steve corrected, sounding amused.

The handle on the door turned and clicked, the door was slowly pushed open to reveal a concerned looking Captain America. "Feel better know?" he asked, wrinkling his nose at the smell.

Tony rolled his eyes. "What the hell do you think." He unsteadily got to his feet and leaned over the sink, taking deep breaths. A warm, large hand was on his back suddenly, gently rubbing. It felt wonderful.

"You shouldn't eat anything else for a while; let your gut settle, but drinks lots of water." Steve had an air of someone who knew what they were talking about. "My mother was a nurse." Ah, that would explain it. "I was sick a lot...but I picked up a few things before she..."

Steve's rubbing stops, and the bathroom becomes very quiet. "Anyway, I'd go to bed if I were you."

Tony turns around. "Bed?" he asks, suddenly stupid.

"Yes, Tony, _bed_." Steve said slowly. "The thing you normally sleep on, or rather, the thing you should sleep on rather than a beat up couch in your workshop."

Tony clicked his tongue. "Don't believe everything JARVIS says to you." He held up his hand in defeat. "Alright, I surrender all mighty one...no wait that's Thor...what were we talking about?"

"_Bed_" Steve repeated, and pointed his finger in the direction of Tony's room.

Tony sulked but made his way to his bedroom, dragging his feet all the way.

Tony didn't throw up again that day, or even the next day...at least, nobody saw or heard him. He did have an en suite after all.


	3. Chapter 3

Two years ago, if you told Tony that New York was being invaded by Aliens he would have suggested that your brain looked at. But now all he would do is huff in annoyance and say "What, again?"

Little green men, monsters, super spies, and that weird squid thing they fought that one time, all were just part and parcel to Tony's very strange life.

However, it wasn't aliens this time; but rather a group of genetically modified monkeys with wings that had somehow broken loose from some wanna be scientist's basement nearby.

"...I understand that reference." Steve said looking at the sky.

The monkeys were not that hard to round up, but they bit and clawed like crazy and had to be knocked out with tranquilizers and shipped off in giant metal crates to one of SHEILD's ominous facilities.

The scientist, who was no older than nineteen allowed himself to be taken into custody if the SHIELD agents promised not to inform his mother what he son had been hiding in their basement.

"Kids these days..." said Clint as the boy was bundled into the back of a windowless black van by at least six Colson look alikes (SHIELD agents looked the same to Tony).

"When I was his age-" Steve started, and Tony groaned and rolled his eyes; here we go. "I listened to the radio, I went to sock hops...and that was good enough for me." He shook his head. "I feel like I should call his father or something."

Tony rubbed the back his neck. "Chances are Cap that Daddy ran off with his dance instructor years ago."

Natasha was busy picking her nails with one of her many blades. "With a kid like that, I'm not surprised."

Tony frowned, that was a little harsh. He'd been like that when he was a teen, not as extreme, mind you, but on the same wavelength. A bright kid no one knew what to do with and whose parents were too preoccupied with their own lives to keep track of. The sound of high pitched, broken yet eerily cheery music nearby made everyone fall silent.

They all knew what it was.

"HULK WANT VANILLA CONE." There was no real arguing with that.

Steve sighed and took everyone's order's for Mr Softy, when he came to Tony the scientist politely declined.

"Are you sure?" Steve pressed, looking bewildered.

Tony considered the sticky treat in his mind...approximately 11.05 grams of fat, 43.54 grams of carbs, and all in all it had 269 calories. The thought made Tony's gut constrict painfully, assured Cap that he didn't want anything.

Hauling his shield over his back Steve lumbered off to get the ice cream with the help of Hulk, who returned with a raspberry Popsicle for Natasha, a chocolate smothered thing for Clint doused in sprinkles, a Rocket pop for Thor, and Steve...well Steve's an old fashioned guy and just gets a plain old ice cream cone, plus six for the hulk.

Tony has taken seat on an accommodating corner of the sidewalk, watching as his exhausted teammates munch their way through at least 500 calories of Ice cream and assorted icy goodness.

It was hot outside, but it was also hot inside so it didn't matter to Tony. For no reason at all Steve came and sat next to him, planting himself down with an 'oof!' and sent a dribble of his ice cream flying. It had already begun to melt over his gloved fingers, streams of creamy white over bright red.

Steve gave Tony a look out of the corner of his eye "You okay metal head?" he asks. Steve didn't often use nicknames, but the sheer amount that Tony had given him means that he was more than entitled to have a go.

The genius gestured to Steve's hand with his head. "Your ice cream is melting."

Steve looked confused then glanced downward to see a puddle of white by his left boot. "Oh darn it!" he cried now holding the cone at arm's length.

There was the sound of thundering footsteps and the hulk in all his bigness now loomed over the pair, having now only one ice cream of his own left.

Tony smiled up at the giant "Hey big green, what's up?" he tried to ignore the way Steve had gone stiff beside him.

"TIN MAN NO LIKE ICECREAM?" rumbled the hulk.

"I like Ice cream; I just don't want any right now." Tony explained.

The Hulk huffed. "BANNER WORRIED ABOUT TIN MAN."

Tony blinked. "Oh? How come?" he asked.

"TIN MAN NEVER EAT, NEVER SLEEP."

Tony made an indignant sounding noise and scowled upward at the hulk. "Lies! Slander! I sleep and eat just as much as anyone!"

The hulk then rumbled and pushed one of his huge hands into Tony's face, with one lonely ice cream code protruding from it. "THEN HAVE ICE CREAM."

Tony turned to Steve for help but the blonde just shrugged. "Sorry Tony, I wouldn't argue with him if I were you."

Tony had a face like thunder and he turned to the Hulk and said in a low voice. "You know my mom _died_, and I'm not in the market for a new one, Banner."

From nearby came an exuberated sigh. "Just take the fucking cone Stark" said Clint.

Before Tony could retort, the ice cream in the Hulk's hand dropped from its cone and landed in Tony's lap, covering his armour in sticky mess. "OH Christ!" he exclaimed, shaking the stuff from his hands with his blood boiling.

Steve stood up too and attempted to help wipe the armour clean but only succeeded in smearing it in further. "Don't worry its only a little-" Tony smacked Steve's hands away with more ferocity than intended and winced as Steve made his kicked puppy dog face.

The genius grumbled, he was so done with this. Without another word he launched into the sky and began his flight towards the Tower; turning his comm. Link off.

"What the hell was that about? Jesus what a drama queen."

"...I don't know, but I'm worried."

"So am I, this thing needs to be nipped in the bud right now."

"Perhaps if we talked to our Shield Brother? Ask what troubles him."

"I'll do it. I'm team leader, I need to fix this."

"...good luck, Steve."


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors note:** Changing up my style a little bit, hope you approve ^^

Tony was sitting in the kitchen, which was odd, because it was his least favourite place. The smell of food that his team had prepared and long since eaten still hung in the air; like a dark cloud over his head. He was clutching in his fist a cup of coffee which he'd only half drunk, he was far to jittery to enjoy his drink.

e felt as if everything would crumble down at any moment, his precious persona which had taken years of crafting; dissected in front of his eyes. Tony could hear the soft, comforting whir of JARVIS in the ceiling. The robot was the only one truly informed about just how... troubled, (For lack of a better word) the billionaire was.

The only other person who was even remotely close was Bruce, and that was because Tony spent the most time with him. But lately that had stopped, it was too much of a risk, and Tony knew Bruce had enough to worry about. It didn't hurt any less though. He hoped, for his sake, and Bruce's, that the other man would just stop asking and therefore stop being disappointed; when Tony turned him down with whatever excuse he could think of on the spot. He did miss Bruce, it felt like he hadn't seen him for days; or any other member of the team for that matter.

Tony was a master of avoidance, and he did have a company to run, so, if he wasn't around in the mornings... afternoons... and sometimes evenings as well, it was no big deal. Pepper had always said he should take his work more seriously. However, she was starting to suspect too. She was worried, and said Tony looked pale and not himself and that maybe he was pushing himself too hard. Tony waved her off with a smile. "I'm fine Pep, honestly." Lying seemed second nature to him now.

Then there was Steve Rogers. Who Tony was sure had been defrosted by some divine force in order to punish him. He was always nearby when the billionaire was throwing up, and always asked the questions that Tony couldn't answer. The man was clearly on a mission, and sometimes just to throw him off the scent Tony would make sure to stuff his face with a chocolate bar in plain sight, then, sneak away to empty his guts into his sink.

But the blonde was cleverer than Tony first imagined, and he knew it was only a matter of time before things came to ahead. Tony had a bad feeling that this particular day, was the day it would happen. He heard strong footsteps behind him, a soldier's march, and he turned to see Steve coming towards him from across the room. He had been right. The younger man had a determined look, the type of look he got before he went into a fight.

Tony could practically see the gears working in his head. Steve's jaw was set tightly, but when Tony looked at him, he must have been a pitiful that the blonde's expression softened. "Hey Tony." He said, clearly trying for casual, but there was strain in his features, Tony grunted in response. Steve gestured to the stool nearest to the other man. "Mind if I...?" he asked tentatively. Tony shrugged his shoulders, not really caring at all. Steve took that as permission to sit down, he then immediately locked eyes with the billionaire. "We need to talk."

So, he wasn't going to bother with pleasantries. "Yeah?" Tony replied, feigning ignorance, not that it would help. "Yes." Steve said, not fooled a bit. "I don't really know how to say this without sounding like a jerk, but I don't think the softly softly approach is gonna get me anywhere." he paused. he paused. "You look like Death." Tony didn't say anything, so Steve continued. "And I know why, it's because you're not eating, are you?" it wasn't really a question and Tony wouldn't have answered truthfully anyway. "You're not my babysitter, Spangles." It was exactly the wrong thing to say, but Tony's brain was just not cooperating. "This isn't about-" The blonde snapped but then reeled himself back in, taking a breath. "Do you even realise how dangerous this is? You're putting yourself at risk-"

"We put ourselves at risk everyday when we go out to zap bad guys." Tony added. "Do you know how many times I've died in the past year? I've got a fucking _counter_ in my head and what about the others? Or, dare I say it, you?"

Steve gritted his teeth. "That's not the point;_ starving_ yourself for whatever crazy reason and doing your job is not the same thing Tony."

Tony forced himself to sit up as straight as possible and look annoyed, but he was sapped of energy and his stomach had begun to tinge painfully after only an hour of respite. "You make it sound so dramatic" he rolled his eyes. "Look, Capsicle, if I give you the 411, will you leave me alone?" It was unpleasant business; Tony actually liked Steve, a lot more than he ever imagined, he would... of course, _that _train of thought needed to be stopped at the station before Tony got himself in a bigger mess. Secret and totally weird crushes were not important right now.

Steve narrowed his eyes, but seemed to accept Tony's proposal. He crossed his arms over his chest. "Okay. I'm listening."

Right. Tony hadn't actually worked out what he was going to say, and for a minute he sat there dumbly while his brain booted itself up. Eventually, he sighed, defeated. "Alright Cap, I don't know if you noticed, I mean you probably did because you have Super soldier vision... advanced corneas? or something. If you did you didn't say anything which is nice, because people can be dicks about these things and my self esteem is already shrivelled up and-"

"Get to the point, Stark." Steve snapped.

"I might have... okay I'm 89% sure that I've put on a bit of weight since "the day the earth stood still" 2012 version went down, and again thanks for not saying anything... "

Steve's mouth was slightly open and his blue eyes widened as Tony spoke "Are you being serious?" he asked. Tony winced and nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, I know it's terrible; I don't work out much and what can say? I like pizza, lots of pizza."

Steve looked part aghast and part furious and he spluttered out "That's not what I meant! How could you even -Tony! if anything you've lost weight! You look like you should be in the hospital! how is none of this getting through to you?" Steve was clearly frustrated, then, quite suddenly he was sullen. "I blame myself for this... I'm supposed to be responsible for my team... I haven't been looking out for you like I should have."

Tony felt rage bubble inside of his gut. "Oh, Oh I see. This makes so much more sense, of course you don't care about me personally, no, you just don't want to be blamed for me dying, not that anyone would care. In fact, I bet you'd get some sort of award, with a fucking medal, "the man who rid the world of Tony Stark" it'll go with your eyes."

Steve visibly recoiled at Tony's words, and tried to use his "calm down ma'am" voice. "That came out wrong, and _of course_ people would care if you died. _I_ would care." He gently touched Tony's arm with his fingers. "Maybe I'm going about this the wrong way, but you need to go to a doctor, and Bruce doesn't count." He smiled shyly but Tony gave him a frosty glare.

"I'm gonna go now, I'm a busy man, I'm sure there are cats stuck in trees and old ladies crossing the street that need you attention." Tony stalked away, leaving Steve by himself.

Steve didn't stop Tony, he knew it was a lost cause, and if anything he'd made it worse. But he wouldn't give up, no, he just needed some support.

"JARVIS?"

"Yes, Captain Rogers?"

"Do you have the number for Miss Potts?"


	5. Chapter 5

"I hate to bother you like this Miss Potts." Steve was nursing a cup of coffee in his hand; he looked across the table to Tony's CEO slash... girlfriend maybe? He wasn't sure. All he knew was that she and Tony went back, and that might help in this hopeless situation.

She smiled gently back at Steve, with warm eyes that made Steve feel like he'd known her forever. "Not at all, I'm kind of the go to person when Tony makes a mess, and call me Pepper" She chuckled, but it was fond. "So, what did he do now?"

Steve found it hard to articulate the problem without sounding panicked; he didn't want to worry Miss Potts... Pepper, too much, but this was definitely very serious. He'd never known anyone to act how Tony was acting, it was so frustrating to Steve that the genius kept himself at arm's length, if he knew Tony better; maybe he would've spotted this a while ago.

Steve sighed and said "I'm very worried about Tony at the moment, he's acting all..." he searched for the word "Funny. Not the ha-ha kind."

Pepper made a face like she didn't understand. "Why? What's he been doing?" She then trailed off for a minute. "I mean he has been kind of strange, but I have no idea what goes on in that tower." She looked to the Captain, awaiting an answer.

"Well, I don't mean to worry you but Tony's not been eating, if he can help it anyway, it's like he's avoiding food even when he's clearly hungry... and Dr Banner seems to think he might be making himself throw up." There was no point sugar coating it, he needed help.

There was a heavy silence and Pepper's expression shifted, first she looked for a moment like she would jump up, but then composed herself. "Okay. How long has this been going on?" she asked.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck as he thought. "I'm not too sure, a few weeks."

Pepper's eyes flew wide open. "A few weeks?!" she then put her hand over her mouth and Steve felt like he should say something to comfort her, the guilt was making him itch. She blinked and took a breath. "How much do you care about Tony?" she looked at him dead on. "Honestly."

The question threw Steve. "Eh, a lot, he's my friend. He's one of the smartest guys I ever met... and he puts his heart into everything he does. He gets my goat sometimes, and we fight, but he treats me like a person and not like a ghost or a school boy." He gave her a sincere look. "I care a great deal about him."

_Maybe more that what appropriate, _Steve thought silently.

Pepper was quiet for a moment, considering his answer, and then said "You need to tell me everything. But not here, let's go somewhere more private." She stood up and gestured Steve to follow.

Pepper was quiet for a moment, considering his answer, and then said "You need to tell me everything. But not here, let's go somewhere more private." She stood up and gestured Steve to follow. The pair left the lobby, and descended down a few corridors before coming to a room which Steve assumed was Pepper's office. She opened the door; the office was large and airy, with a beautiful view of the city below. Steve had to take a moment to absorb the sight, gaping slightly at the huge expanse of buildings and tiny ant-like people on the sidewalks.

Pepper smiled at his reaction. "Take a seat."

Steve sat down in a chair just opposite her, feeling a little bit like a kid whose been sent to the principal. He tried to sit still.

Pepper took her time sitting down, and didn't talk right away; she seemed to be in a world of her own. It was clear all she was thinking about was Tony, It was clear all she was thinking about was Tony, and Steve suddenly became envious of the love the two old friends had for each other. He was fleetingly reminded of Bucky, and his throat became uncomfortably dry, so he pushed the memories to the back of his mind... for the moment at least.

"Okay." Pepper said, getting Steve's attention. "When did it start?"

It was surprisingly easy to relay the story to Pepper, she had an aura of openness and it invited Steve to keep talking. He did feel regret well up inside him as he recounted his own lack of intervention, how he should have seen it, how he should have done something earlier. He tried to keep himself clinical and professional, but the image of Tony throwing up his guts into the bathroom sink made him gag a little himself. The idea that his friend should waste away in front of his eyes frightened him.

Pepper didn't say a word throughout Steve's explanation, her expression remained stoic, but Steve could see her eyes were burning with something; anger maybe? pain? he didn't know her well enough to guess. After a very long time, Steve finished his unfortunate account with him confronting Tony the previous day; and not making any progress.

Pepper drew in a breath and let a long suffering sigh, she leaned forward on her desk and her eyes were glazed over. "Can I call you Steve?" she asked, and Steve nodded. "Steve, you did the right thing talking to Tony. I would've strangled him, or lost my mind.. he just, I-I... " She took a moment. "We used to be... involved, I don't know if you-"

Steve smiled. "Yeah. Tony said."

"Of course he did. So, I'm probably not the best person to talk to him without getting - letting my emotions take over. I care about him so much, he's... well, he's just him isn't he? I'm hurt that he didn't tell me there was something wrong, but that's not important." She looked up. "Make no mistake, Steve, this is very, very serious, I hope that it's just one of Tony's moods and not actually..."

Steve frowned in confusion. "Not actually what?" he asked.

Pepper looked like she didn't know what to say, then recovered. "Steve, do you know what an eating disorder is?"

Steve felt a rush of heat up his neck, he had no idea what an Eating disorder was. But it didn't sound good at all. "Umm, no." he admitted.

Pepper gave him a reassuring look. "It's alright. An eating disorder is a psychological condition that changes someone's eating habits, there are different types, bulimia for example, usually involves the person binge eating and then making themselves sick. Then Anorexia makes someone starve themselves, and what little food they do have they throw back up... that's a very brief explanation, the physical and emotional effects of these conditions can be devastating."

Steve took all this in, and he found that, yes, he had encountered something like that before. When he was at school, he'd heard of gal's going on extreme diets to fit into their prom dresses, or, of traumatised soldiers refusing food and vomiting up what was forced into them. He suddenly became very cold as he considered the possibility of Tony suffering... what was it called? Bulimia? Anorexia? the name didn't matter, it was clearer now just how bad things were, or could get if they didn't act fast.

"Steve?" Pepper was peering at him. "Are you okay?"

Steve shook his head. "Not really." he sounded a bit choked. "What happens now? How do we help Tony?"

Pepper stood up and came around to him, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Get him to a doctor, I'll come with you, I don't care if you have to drag him or drug him just take him to one. Bruce doesn't count. Once we're absolutely it is what it is, I really hope it's not, but if it is as bad as you say, then, we'll get some proper advice... maybe therapy, but we need to know how much weight Tony's lost, and whether or not he'll have to go to the hospital..." she trailed off again, soft tears threatened to leak from the corners of her eyes. "I'll kill him."

Steve took her soft hand in his own, and he gave it a small squeeze. "Yeah. Me too."


	6. Chapter 6

Tony wasn't prepared for the sight of Steve Rogers, and Pepper Potts, both with faces like thunder to be standing just outside his lab. They were strategically blocking his entrance.

He pulled a face of confusion when he saw them. "Ummm Hi? nice surprise and all Pep, but I thought you had a meeting."

"Some things are more important." Pepper said with an edge to her voice that sent several alarms in Tony's head ringing, her calm facial expression made him want to run for the hills. He looked between the two, waiting for an explanation that didn't come.

"Ooookay. So either you've both been eaten by alien body snatcher's or something's up, I really hope its not the first one, because I hate aliens, really, except Thor, he's cool." He starts to babble like he does when he's trying to avoid something, but Tony couldn't help it, unease prickled at his insides.

Steve folded his arms over his chest. "I tried talking to you and that didn't work, so I brought reinforcements." he motioned to Pepper. "I've told her what's been going on, Tony."

Tony blinked, absorbing that sentence then let out an outraged. "You did WHAT?!"

Steve set his jaw. "I. Told. Pepper. What's. Been. Going. On." he repeated, each beat feeling like a nail was being hammered into Tony's rhetorical coffin. In that moment Tony wanted to inflict a great deal of suffering on his supposed 'friend', but he was far more alarmed with the pent up rage that he could feel radiating off Pepper in this moment. He took a step back.

"Pep, look, I don't know what the Capsicle has told you-" he started.

"Don't even try that Tony. Just don't. It's insulting to your intelligence and mine." the red haired woman cut him off roughly.

"But I didn't do anything wrong!" Tony stressed. "It's not a thing! honestly! don't get all-"

"What Tony?" Pepper demanded. "Concerned about you? Make you see that your killing yourself? this 'thing' that's not a thing has, apparently, been going on for weeks, and not once did you feel like you could tell me." She stopped and took a moment to keep all her emotions from unravelling.

Tony saw this and became very distressed. "What-no,no,no,no, please don't, Pepper, sorry, sorry,sorry-" He flung himself at her and held on tightly. Steve's eyebrows went up to his hair line.

Pepper hesitated, but then returned the hug and twirled a lock of his hair in her fingers, the genius's head then dropped to her shoulder. "I'm sorry." he mumbled.

"You've said." Pepper whispered to him. She gave him a reassuring squeeze. "I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have yelled, this isn't your fault."

Tony lifted up his head and titled his head in bewilderment. "I thought it was always my fault, huh, that's a first." He gave a definite glare to Steve who was looking very awkward indeed by the lab doors.

"I just... I guess I'm angrier at myself that I didn't notice before." She looked into Tony's eyes. "I'm supposed to be your friend, we were in a relationship, I know more things about you than anyone...how could I not have seen?..." she swallowed. "What kind of friend does that make me?"

"The best one ever. Period." Tony said, taking her face in his hands, very gentle.

She smiled sadly and took his hands and kissed his palms. "Well. That doesn't matter now. What does matter is that me and Steve care about you, and we're going to help you, Tony, we'll get through this... you just need to go to a doctor."

Tony suddenly went very still. While Pepper's hands had been warm and soft, now they felt cold and clammy, and he pulled away from her. At least he tried too, she seemed to have anticipated his move and held on tighter. He then was forced to yank his hands from her grip.

"Tony." Pepper said, reaching out to him again, but he wouldn't have it, and he stepped backwards; to come into contact with something solid and warm.

"Please, Tony, we don't want to fight with you." Steve soothed, his chest rumbling with his words, and Tony was gently bounced as the man breathed in and out. The genius spun around to look at the Captain square in the eye "You're a fucking tattle tale." He snipped.

Steve let out an amused huff. "Really? What are you, eight years old?" He then looked very serious. "This isn't about telling tales or getting you into trouble, I got Pepper's help because I didn't know what to do with you."

Tony snorted. "Oh I see, on first name terms are we?" he looked Pepper up and down. "You move on fast."

Steve turned a bit red in the face, and Pepper looked rightly annoyed. "Don't you try and deflect Tony, because that doesn't work on me. Besides, even if we were...it's been months, and I've _defiantly_ seen you take a few women back to the tower in the limo."

Steve cleared his throat, uncomfortable. "Anyway, that's not the issue here; Pepper has told me that you might have something called an eating disorder."

Tony let out a noise of hurt and indignation and really wished he could storm off in anger but settled to swerve between his ex and his so called friend with a look that could melt the armour.

"What the hell do you think I am? A teenage girl? No, just no, I am so done talking to you." He went to push by Pepper but he was seized by his shirt by Steve, whose grip was firm and unyielding.

"I knew you'd react like this" Pepper sighed, looking genuinely pained. "Tony, I love you, I do, but I don't think you're capable of making the right choices right now." There was a beat. "So, I've book you an appointment at the hospital, you might need urgent medical attention for all we know."

At the word '_hospital' _Tony began to struggle in Steve's grip even though logically he was wasting his time, but logic was out of the window, his brain was screaming 'get away, get away, get away' for no reason at a reasonable request.

"Like _that's_ going to happen" Tony snapped. "JARVIS? Activate the-"

Steve's hand clasped over Tony's mouth who let out several muttered curses, he wriggled as Steve more or less picked his up; still with one hand stopping him from calling the armour.

"Miss Potts?" Whirred JARVIS overhead "My sensors detect that sir is in distress."

"Everything's okay JARVIS, this is for Tony's own good" Pepper called to the ceiling.

Tony let out a noise in disagreement and then realised that he was being steadily carried down the hall by Steve, lead by Pepper toward the elevator.

For a moment, Tony got his mouth free to say. "I'm not Bucky! You can't save me Cap." At that, Tony was dumped rather unceremoniously into the elevator with Steve looking absolutely furious above him, Pepper decided to take the stairs.

"How dare you bring him into this." Steve said, level, but deadly. "You think you can wheedle your way out of trouble by upsetting me? Well, fine, you've upset me, but you will not carry on like this. I don't care if I have to drag you there by your ankles . . ."

Tony didn't respond, just sulked in the corner of the elevator, far away from Steve, scratching at the walls with his nails. After a spell, Tony felt a warm hand kneading his hair. He tentatively looked up but Steve wasn't, or would not make eye contact with him. The air was painfully thick and Tony wished he could be somewhere, anywhere but here.

"You have no idea how much we care, how much I care, Tony." Steve said, in a hushed tone.

Tony didn't say anything at all.

They finally reached the tower's parking lot, and Pepper was already waiting with Happy, and a car.

Steve picked the genius up and then, much gentler this time, set him down on the floor. "Hm. Think you can cooperate with us? With me?" he asked.

Tony really didn't like being on the floor, so he stood up, brushed off the dust, and looked at the awaiting car.

"I don't really have a choice do I?"


	7. Chapter 7

Tony Stark hated, no, correction, he loathed hospitals.

After his arrival back home from his nightmarish experience in Afghanistan, he spant a good few weeks being poked by doctors, staring at the dull ceiling of a hospital room, and being told many, many times "your very lucky to be alive."

Lucky was the exact opposite of what Tony felt. A good man had died, and a whole many more had been killed because of him. Because he was clueless, selfish, and had bad taste in friends. He resolved to fix that, to 'innovate', as his father would have put it.

His father would have been disgusted to see him now, weak and frail, and being gently lead by Steve Rogers and Pepper Potts into the Roosevelt Hospital. Tony normally paid for the best private healthcare, as he had... complicated medical needs, but Pepper was so concerned that she bypassed the usually routes and just booked Tony to see the closest Doctor as soon as possible.

The waiting room smelled faintly of vomit, but strongly of cleaning solution.

Everywhere there were people coughing, reaching, clutching at bloody wounds, and looking generally worse for wear. The genius felt like he'd walked right into one of the circles of hell, if this wasn't some form of purgatory then he didn't know what was. Steve's gently rubbing of his shoulder muscles did little to calm the wave of illogical, unscientific dread that was eating at his senses. All he wanted to do was run, run as far and as fast as he could and never stop until he found a place to hide. He was good at that, hiding, why couldn't they have just left him? Was he worth saving? Really?

"Is he normally so..." Steve said over Tony's head to Pepper, Tony heard them talk but didn't process the words. "Jittery?" he asked.

"He has a thing about Hospitals." Pepper replied, and then sighed. "I promise we won't be waiting too long.

"I hope so."

The soft caressing didn't stop, but was lost on the dark haired man as he'd begun to rock back and forth, a comforting motion from his childhood that he should have grown out of. He was imagining himself in his workshop, working on whatever brilliant new gadget that would certainly change the future, his robot family were around him and he was safe.

But he wasn't safe. He was exposed, cut open, shamed, everything was falling apart at the seams and he couldn't mend them.

By the time his name was called he was already well on his way to a panic attack and Steve tried desperately to get his attention but Tony remained dumb and unresponsive. He briefly recalled then that the scenery changed, Pepper and Steve were gone, and that it was quieter.

He blinked back to hazy reality, a nurse was telling him to take deep breaths and a doctor, an older woman with red hair, was checking his... pulse? blood pressure maybe?

"Are you with us, Mr Stark?" she asked.

Tony nodded.

She smiled and seemed pleased. "Good. You suffered a panic attack and you didn't answer when we tried to talk to you, we removed you from the waiting room so you could calm down, do you recall any of the last few minutes?"

Tony looked up at her. "Er... yeah, I just... spaced out. I feel okay though."

The Doctor listened carefully. "Alright. I just took your blood pressure and it is lower than we would like to see in a man your age, even with your heart condition." Tony huffed out a laugh, she was being tactful. "Nurse Cain? if you could leave us please."

The nurse quickly left the room. "Ring if you need me Dr White." she said as she went out.

Tony drew up his legs under his chin, trying to make himself smaller, and bring himself back together a bit more. Dr White gave Tony a concerned look out of the corner of her eyes after she had scanned what appeared to be, his notes.

"Now..." she started. "I believe you were admitted by a Miss Potts and a Mr Rogers? on the grounds of a suspected eating disorder, is this right?"

"Yes."

"Hmm. I'm going to ask you a few questions if that's alright, they'll be a bit personal, but an eating disorder can be very serious, and I'd rather have all the information before I make a final diagnosis."

Tony shrugged. "Shoot."

Dr White clicked her pen. "On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your body condition?"

"...Five."

"Okay. Do you consistently eat three meals a day? plus snack foods?"

"No."

"What does your diet consist of?"

"Um.. Crackers, fruit... smoothies, err...chocolates bars sometimes, nuts, salads, Coffee."

"Any bread? meat? dairy?"

"Not really..."

"Right. Do you throw up after you eat?"

"..."

"I need an answer Mr Stark."

"Yeah, after a big meal...I do."

"Are you tired? Unusually irritable? Do you feel depressed in yourself?"

"Check. All three"

"Do you weigh yourself?"

"Yeah. Once a day."

"Once a day?"

"Yes."

"Hmm. Do you feel that there's something wrong?"

"I, I'm not sure what I think anymore. I just want to be left alone."

Dr White finished scribbling, than stood up and put her clipboard to one side."Good. I'd like to run a few tests now, just to make sure everything's okay." She smiled. "All right handsome, shirt off if you please."

Tony hesitated, and for good reason. "I don't think that's a good idea."

The Doctor seemed not to mind. "If you don't feel comfortable, I understand, but I will have to ask you to step on the scales for me."

Oh. Tony was dead, so very dead.

He couldn't decide which was worse; both would end in his absolute humiliation.

"Mr Stark? I would you like me to call the nurse?"

Tony shook his head, the less people to see this, the better. He got up from the bed and Dr White gently guided him towards a very menacing looking pair of scales. They were made of a stainless metal and looked somewhat like those used in butcher's shops. He swallowed hard, and closed his eyes as he gingerly stepped onto them.

He waited, and waited, and waited some more.

Finally, the Doctor asked him to step off, and he couldn't get back to the bed fast enough. She paged the nurse, who came dutifully back into the room.

"Nurse Kain? Could you please take Mr Stark to get a drink? and something to eat if he would like, I have to write up some things, and speak with Miss Potts and Mr Rogers, could you send them in on your way?"

The Nurse nodded and gave Tony her 'Don't worry' smile and he found himself being taken out of the secure room into the hallway.

"Do you like Coffee?" Nurse Kain asked him.

"Yeah." He replied. "Very much."


End file.
